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.They won’t find your body until morning, little brother.By that time, I’ll have Grace wrapped around my fingers, Pretty-boy.”“Aw, Gabriel, you keep calling me a pretty boy and I might start thinking you find me attractive,” I murmured as I fought with my body to stay in control.“Even in your last breaths, you joke.Just think about how your little Grace will feel when she sees you’re nothing more than a junkie.Maybe, I’ll even add to her heartbreak by wrapping your dead body around one of your repulsive whores.Then she’ll see Shane Maxton for who he really was.Don’t worry, I’ll be the ANGEL who comforts her.”His laughter echoed between the walls of the brick buildings that towered over my body.My limbs started shaking violently and my mouth filled with foaming salvia.My thoughts were warm and fuzzy, all I could do is scream out for Michael, and beg for some sort of help.Then the heroin hit.Warmth enveloped my body, it was one of those warmths that separated your mind from your body, and I could feel nothing of how my body was shutting down, convulsing and snarling on the cold street.Everything felt perfect and I would have sworn that we lived in a world where everyone rode on pink unicorns and nothing could ever go wrong.There was no danger, Grace was a lost thought and my veins almost burst with the high.I know in my haze that I heard my voice calling for Michael, and somewhere deep inside my brain, I sensed that this feeling wasn’t supposed to be this good.My heart rate escalated to a wild drumming rhythm and my heart almost burst from the pressure.My body was overdosing, but my high let me feel nothing but pure pleasure.Somewhere inside the sublime euphoria, panic took hold, and my heart sped up even faster.I felt my breaths coming out in struggling gasps and my brain pounded against my skull.I wanted to die.Please Michael, take this poison out of me.Crawling out of the alley, I stumbled into the dark street and collapsed in front of a yellow taxi barreling towards me.Brakes screeched, but then strong, feathered arms pulled me up, lifting me over the vehicle and into the night.Michael carried me; the heat and burn of the heroin tore out of my body, leaving me twisted and tortured, but utterly sober.I blacked out, spiraled into nothingness, the earth falling from beneath my feet; I fell.And I landed hard.When I opened the door to my apartment with trembling hands, it was 7:30 in the morning.Cringing, I stepped into what looked like a frat party exploded all over my once clean walls.What the hell could make such a disaster?My answer walked in on red stiletto heels, with wild and messy shoulder length dark hair, and wearing nothing but a pair of little red lacy panties.Ignoring Bliss, heroin poster child, one of original Shane’s lifelong friends, I bolted to my bedroom (which one of the guys had the decency to lock for me).My heart was hammering erratically in my chest and my hands shook violently from the quick withdrawal of the drugs in my system.How the hell was I going to get through a band practice like this? I knew from experience, this was just the beginning.I needed a run.I needed to go for a run and work off this… this… uncontrollable… feeling.My legs shook.I bounced on the balls of my feet.My skin crawled.Fuck.It was 7:40! An hour and twenty minutes.I have an hour and twenty minutes before Grace will see me.She couldn’t see me like this.I tore off my shirt and pants and ran into the bathroom.Bliss was right behind me, yapping her high-pitched scratchy voice off at me, “Where the hell have you been all night? Alex was telling me about your new little guitarist.Says you got some serious feelings for her.Shane Maxton don’t do serious.What’s your story?”I slammed the bathroom door in her face and turned the shower on.I needed the shakes to stop.I needed my muscles to calm down.Scalding hot water slid over my body, sending searing pain through my skin, into my pores and veins.Falling to my knees, my body convulsed against the absence of the drugs.I fumbled halfway out of the bathtub and grasped hold of the damp porcelain of the toilet bowl.Nausea knotted and cramped at my stomach muscles until I purged what toxins were left inside me; my naked body twisting and fighting against itself across the cold tiled floor.My temperature soared and my muscles ached savagely.Crawling back into the tub, with whatever little energy I had left, I scrubbed my skin raw with soap.My flesh itched and craved its high.I can’t do this.I can’t let Grace see me like this.I needed to cancel practice.This body couldn’t fight this need, not in front of everyone.The blazing stream of the shower rinsed the soap away.I watched the tiny bubbles whirl in circles as they were flushed down the metal drain and I wished I could liquefy and follow; flow into the running water and eventually evaporate into the world.My hands pawed blindly at the spout of the faucet, but my hands were too heavy and weak to turn the water off.My whimpers echoed against the tiled walls and mocked me
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