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.Mom isn't happyabout my lifestyle; Dad isn't happy that I've turned my back on three generations of Drakesfarming in Oklahoma.I'm not happy knowing that, deep down, they wish I was someone more likeJoe." He rubbed the side of his head unhappily."Sometimes I think I'm a changeling.I couldn't bemore of a misfit in my family if I'd been left on the doorstep in a basket."Shar was very quiet for a long time."But I thought—you said—""I said I loved my parents.I do.And they love me.They just don't understand me." He laughedweakly."Oh, Shar, it's awfully difficult to explain.Sometimes you can care a great deal aboutsomeone, and simply not understand him at all.Especially if you're related to him."She blinked at him."Forgive me for saying earlier that life in your world is simpler.""Life is ne'er simple, lass." Tom Cadge spoke softly from the rear seat." 'Twasn't when I was alad, and likely has got no better.There's more grief 'twixt relations than strangers.""Don't misunderstand me.I love my folks, Thomas," Tannim protested."I just don't fit in theirlives anymore.Their home—just isn't home for me now.I don't belong there anymore.I can't goback without feeling like an alien.""Well, now, that's as it should be, eh?" Tom cocked his head to the side and turned his bandagedface toward Tannim."The chick don't go back in the shell, do he? Nor the wee bird go back to hisfile:///F|/rah/Mercedes%20Lackey/Lackey,%20M.errated%20Edge%204%20-%20Chrome%20Circle.txt (126 of 173) [6/4/03 10:33:37 PM]file:///F|/rah/Mercedes%20Lackey/Lackey,%20Mercedes%20-%20Serrated%20Edge%204%20-%20Chrome%20Circle.txtmam's nest come spring again? Ye can't go back to a home, lad, not once ye be a man grown.Ye haveto make your home, your own home, or it ain't really your home, if ye take my meanin'.""What about those who've never had a home, Thomas Cadge?" Shar asked softly, with a note ofbitterness in her voice.Tom turned his head toward her, creating the odd impression that despite his blindness, he stillsaw right through the layers of bandage over the grisly ruins of his eyes."Those who've never gota home has all the more reason to make one, milady," the old man said with odd gentleness."Evenan old man, half mad an' all blind has a reason t' make a home.An' them as never got a home,well, mebbe they ought t' look to them as knows what a good home is, to show 'em how t' build one.'Specially summat who's a friend.Bain't that what friends be for?"Tannim stared at the swirling mist as the silence lengthened."Well," he said, finally, "Before weget out of the Mustang, we'd better get ourselves in a better mood.That mist out there is goingto react to what we're thinking, and even more to what we're feeling.The car's got shieldingenough to keep us from creating any nightmares, but once we get out to study the situation—"Shar straightened visibly, and her face took on an expression of determination."Absolutely right.I think we're letting this miserable place get to us.And absolutely the last thing I want to dois conjure up my wretched father out of the Unformed." She made a grimace of distaste."One of himis bad enough; two would be unbearable.""Oh, I don't know," Tannim replied, managing a chuckle."From what you've said, if you created asecond Charcoal, they'd be so in love with each other we'd never have to worry again."Shar actually smiled."You have a point," she agreed."Still, let's not take any chances." Shepulled her hair back from her face, and closed her eyes for a moment."Right.I assume you don'tknow anything about the Gates, since you haven't volunteered to examine them with me."Tannim spread his hands helplessly."Not a hint.Haven't the vaguest notion how to look into thethings.I make my own Gates when I need 'em, but only back in America.However, I do know a bitabout the Unformed, since Fairgrove got involved in the cleaning up after the disaster atOutremer.If the Gate doesn't pan out, I can probably find that physical connection to the nextrealm.""You can?" Shar brightened visibly."Oh good—I can tell there's one out there, but I can't locateit.""Then I think we have our two tasks laid out for us; nothing like a proper division of labor.AndI believe I'm ready for the mist, if you are." Tannim put his hand on the door and gave Shar aninquiring glance."As ready as I'm likely to be." She sighed, and opened her own door with an expression ofresolution on her face.The Unformed was not precisely "mist" as any human knew it.It was neither cold nor damp.It hadno odor, no taste, nothing to feel—in fact, if Tannim had closed his eyes, he would not have knownit obscured everything in every direction.Anything more than three feet away might just as wellbe invisible.As he understood it, the theory went that the mist was a physical manifestation ofthe available energy in these pockets of Underhill.Raw energy at that; the theory was that oncethat energy was given a form, it ceased to be random and started to obey normal laws of physics.Until then—you had this mist, potential in its purest form.It tried to trick you into giving it a form, too.There were phantom shapes out there, shapes thatteased the mind and made it strive to put definition on the vague shadows.The more the unwaryperson peered, the more his mind tried to match the half-seen shape, the more the half-seen shapefitted itself to the image in a watcher's mind.In the case of one particular child, in a sea of Unformed mist outside Elfhame Outremer, thoseimages had been very terrible.Forget that.Don't look out there.Don't let it trap you.Just hunt for the pathway into the nextfile:///F|/rah/Mercedes%20Lackey/Lackey,%20M.errated%20Edge%204%20-%20Chrome%20Circle.txt (127 of 173) [6/4/03 10:33:37 PM]file:///F|/rah/Mercedes%20Lackey/Lackey,%20Mercedes%20-%20Serrated%20Edge%204%20-%20Chrome%20Circle.txtdomain
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