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.Her grip was tight, firm.She wore sunglasses with big round lenses so he couldn’t see her eyes but he guessed she was in her mid-forties.The skin around her mouth was wrinkled, her lips were thin, and her hair was dyed a chemical yellow.She wore a black T-shirt a size too small for her full breasts and pot belly, and black jeans too small for her expanding arse and thick thighs.She was obviously what Matty and Adelaide would derisively call a bogan, and what his parents, with equal derision, would have called an Australiana.She was a woman who could not take root anywhere else but in this enormous infinite landscape.Unabashed, unashamed.‘He’s better-looking than Leo.’‘Mel knew Leo,’ Anna rushed to explain.‘Yeah, he was a good bloke, your brother.’ Mel stubbed out her cigarette.‘I’m really sorry for your loss.’It was the expected phrase, it came from a stranger, but she said it with unforced sincerity and they were the first words since he’d heard of Leo’s death that brought home the finality of the event.His brother was no more.From now on there would only be past.‘Thank you.’‘When I first left Brendan and began seeing Suzanne, Leo was the only one I could talk to about things.’ Mel was continuing a conversation she had begun with Anna while he was in the toilet.‘Small towns are fucked.Everyone knows you, and Brendan’s really popular with everyone.He’s done work on most people’s pipes or plumbing so you can imagine what they thought of me when I took off with a woman.’ Mel was shaking her head.‘I thought they were going to kill me.Kill both of us.Leo’s was always a safe house; he’d let us come and stay, sleep over.Talk to us about gay rights and shit.Suzanne loved him.She’s devastated he’s gone.’Saverio was horrified.Mel had started to cry.‘Fucking bitch, I hate her!’Anna wrapped her fingers around Mel’s hand.Saverio, confused, looked away.A line of surfers, black and grey and silver strokes, was visible against the vast blue of the ocean.Mel blew her nose into a tissue one more time then glanced down guiltily at Anna’s cigarettes.Anna nodded.‘I shouldn’t.’‘Today doesn’t count.’Mel laughed.‘Yeah, that’s right.’She was looking at Saverio.He couldn’t smile, he didn’t know what she wanted from him.All he could think was what an unlikely lesbian she seemed.He had thought she was a bikie’s moll, an ex-stripper, a small-town mum.Of course it was possible she was all of those things, and a lesbian to boot.Though Dawn wouldn’t find much communion with her.Just like him, Dawn wouldn’t know what to say to Mel.The woman was standing up.‘Thank you for the smokes.’Anna jumped to her feet and hugged her.‘You’ll look after yourself?’‘Of course.’ Mel seemed embarrassed by the spontaneous affection.She slipped out of Anna’s embrace and held out her hand to Saverio, who had also risen.‘Mate, again, I’m really sorry.Your brother was a real good man.’He couldn’t speak.They watched in silence as Mel walked back into the pub.She was shaky on her feet.‘She shouldn’t drive,’ he said gruffly.‘I know, but her girlfriend’s just left her for a younger woman so of course she’s just going to do whatever she likes tonight.We’d all do that.’ Anna pointed to the empty glasses.‘Another round?’‘One more.’ He pointed to her empty chair.‘But you sit.I’m buying.’‘You bought the last round.’‘I work.I’m a corporate cocksucker, as my brother used to so fondly put it.You’re young and a student.I’m paying.’Anna looked as if she was about to protest again.Then, suddenly, she beamed.‘Sure.Thank you.’At the bar, Mel was arguing with two men, one of them in a khaki uniform with an orange and yellow National Parks and Wildlife insignia stitched on the pocket, the other in football shorts, a paint-splattered work singlet and Blundstones.She winked at him as he walked past.Saverio noticed that the painter had his right hand sitting flat against her wide buttocks.‘I hope our friend is alright in there,’ he said to Anna as he delivered the new beer.Anna shrugged and drank greedily.‘She looks like she can take care of herself.’That was not his impression.She looked tough but Mel hadn’t struck him as being tough.The dying afternoon sun was still strong, but finally a breeze was coming off the darkening water.‘She really liked Leo.’‘Yes.’ He would keep his answers short, non-committal, give nothing away.‘It’s good to be reminded of what a wonderful man he could be.You could always talk to Leo about anything.He’d always listen.’He sipped at his beer slowly.‘One of the things I loved about him was that he would never give you the standard adult answer, he’d always take you a little by surprise.When I was ten I found a stash of Julian’s pornos in the house and wanted to read them, but Leo asked me if I had started masturbating.I said no and he wouldn’t let me have them, said it might dull my imagination.That was so unlike him, usually he let us watch and read anything we liked, no censorship whatsoever.Not this time.But he was right.’ Anna sniggered.‘’Course, once I started doing the old five-finger dance he let me have them.’ She winked at Saverio.‘He was such a character.Was he always like that?’‘I guess so.’Anna was frowning.For Christ’s sake, what did she want from him? She lit a cigarette, sat back in her chair and crossed her arms.‘Saverio, I think you should forgive him.’Sin, confession, absolution.These children of communists and feminists and true believers were just as moralistic as the old believers.‘Anna, I’m sorry, but you’re a child.You don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.’He had humiliated her.He could see that she was holding back tears and felt immediate regret.Again, she so reminded him of Adelaide.She was young, she had yet to learn how to hide her emotions from the world.He knew he should apologise but he was enjoying the relief of being harsh and uncompromising
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