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.Austin had warned her.His words of last night drifted through her mind yet again.Can you live with yourself in the morning after what we plan on doing tonight?She d said yes.She d been wrong.Regret filled her, threatened to overwhelm her and she took another deep breath,trying to calm the ensuing panic that threatened to wash over her.What was scary, what worried her was how much she enjoyed it.How comfortable she d felt, suckinga strange man s dick in her mouth.Sharing the experience with Austin, watching him with another man, ithad been exhilarating.Exciting.The phone on her desk rang, startling her from her thoughts.She reached for it, answering it withoutchecking who it was. This is Michaela. Hey. www.samhainpublishing.com 79 ForbiddenHer heart beat double time at the sound of his voice. You re up awfully early. I didn t hear you leave.I missed you. I woke up late.I had to get ready for work. His words echoed in her head, thrilling her despite herworry about last night. Sorry. It s okay. He paused, the silence suddenly heavy with tension. Are you all right? Um, not really, but can we talk about it later? Yeah, that sounds good.Uh, do you want to do something tonight? Go out? Her eyes slid closed and she pressed her lips together.Was this all she was to him? A plaything totake out every evening and have a kinky good time with? I m too tired, Austin.I don t think so. Come on, Michaela. His voice took on that cajoling tone that usually worked on her.Not today. I can t.I don t want to.I m too stressed out. He was quiet for a moment, then drew in a deep breath. Are you freaking out over last night? How did he know this? He always had her pegged and it scared the shit out of her. No. His voice lowered. Liar. She opened her eyes, caught her boss studying her oddly from the doorway of her office.Ducking herhead, Michaela turned around in her chair, away from Tania s questioning gaze. I need to go, Austin.Ihave to get back to work.It s crazy here. Then let s order dinner in, talk a little bit before I have to go to work, he suggested.He really was sweet, kind, thoughtful.Always wanting to take care of her even before they startedfucking.That wasn t nice of her, to think of it as fucking.What they shared went beyond that.Scary but true. I m going to be working late tonight. She didn t know that for sure but she had a feeling. I msorry, but I m going to have to pass. Okay. His voice grew tight, chilled. I ll see you later then. The sound of the click in her ear a moment later made her start to cry. She s avoiding me. Yeah? Brad shoved a forkful of chicken into his mouth. Why? Because you re an asshole? Austin shot him a look from across the table. Very funny. Brad shrugged, wiped his face with a cloth napkin before letting it drop in his lap. What can I say?You pulled the asshole move on me more than a few times.You still do. They were at a restaurant not far from the theatre having dinner.Austin had become desperate overMichaela s withdrawal, needing advice so he d called Brad and asked him to meet him.80 www.samhainpublishing.com Karen EricksonLuckily enough, Brad had come through and now Austin was trying to get some feedback at theminimum some sort of consolation over what happened.Funny thing, he didn t really know what had happened.Well, he did.Michaela regretted last night.Hejust didn t know exactly what she regretted or what had sent her sailing over that point.He needed to know so he could make it right.But typical Michaela, she was avoiding him. Do you really think I m an asshole, Brad? Was I really that shitty when we were together? Could hehave somehow been an asshole to Michaela and sent her the other way? God, he hoped not.Brad studied him, his dark brown eyes intent, his lips pursed.He had a pretty face on the rareoccasion he enjoyed dressing in drag but he wasn t a full-blown queen.He was fun, adventurous and agenerous lover.They were better as friends.It was& easier.Not as much dramatics, not as much emotion.And Bradwas all about the dramatics and emotion when things didn t go his way.Now here he was confronted with emotion and potential dramatics again and he didn t feel the need torun from it.There was no panic in facing it, like he felt with Brad, like he d felt with other lovers.No, nowhe panicked at the thought of Michaela running from him, at the thought of losing her.Forever.Austin blinked, grappling for his glass of water.He found it, brought it to his lips and drained it inseconds, the cold liquid doing nothing to calm his heated worries.He set the glass down to find Brad stillstudying him, his brows lifted in surprise. What happened? You have an epiphany in that moment or what? You looked like you just had theshock of your life. I think I m in love with her, Austin whispered, his voice faltering over the word love.A word he dnever said to anyone ever besides family members. Duh. Brad shook his head and pointed his fork in Austin s direction. You re not really an asshole.I just like to give you crap.You re a guy who runs from the serious stuff because you ve never been ready.We had a good thing going, and you dropped it.Dropped me. Austin winced. Sorry. I forgive you.I forgave you a long time ago, why would I still fuck around with you if I hadn t? Brad laughed for a moment, then let loose a big sigh. You re different with Michaela, you always havebeen.The way you talk to her, take care of her.Even before you admitted it to me, I could tell you feltsomething for her.It made me jealous at first. I know. Austin smiled when Brad shot him a withering glance. Well, I m not jealous of her anymore so screw you.Anyway. Brad waved a hand, as if he dismissedhis old feelings. Now that she s the one running, you re the one chasing.And you never chase.First signof intensity and you re a goner.Now you want to stick around. www.samhainpublishing.com 81 Forbidden I do.I don t want to lose her. The thought of that made his throat close up and he swallowed,pushed his plate away from him in disgust.He d suddenly lost his appetite. Right.So go after her.Tell her how you feel.How you really feel.And not some, oh-baby-let s-fuck-and-get-wild stuff either.She s worried over what happened last night so the last thing she wants to dois something like that again. Since when did you become wise? Brad smiled and resumed attacking his plate.As if he didn t have a care in the world.Austin enviedhis blasé attitude. After dealing with you, my dear.And the endless string of sad little boys that came afteryou. They both laughed and Austin grew quiet, contemplative.Brad was right.He needed to approachMichaela delicately, not all crazy-beast-let s-get-it-on as he had been.She was feeling vulnerable, probablyeven feeling a little disgusted with herself.He wanted to reassure her that everything they d shared was justbetween them.And if she enjoyed it, then she shouldn t feel any shame.He certainly didn t.What happened at theclub last night had been unbelievable.He d never shared anything like that with another person before.Though Jed had played a part in everything they d done last night, he d been so focused on Michaela he dforgotten the other man had been an actual human being.He d become more of a prop.A prop for him and Michaela to suck and lick and slobber all over.Just the memory of it had Austin sblood heating, his cock twitching
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